Compassionate mediation

In NVC-style conflict resolution, creating a connection between the people who are in conflict is the most important thing.

Marshall Rosenberg

Discover the beauty of being heard

This beautiful process can support you in the following situations, where you would like to:

  • have support for each of you to be heard
  • find a more compassionate way to communicate
  • resolve a conflict with another person to mutual satisfaction
  • find a good solution in a situation of conflict
  • find a graceful way to honour and end your relationship
  • prepare for a difficult conversation
  • make amends, heal and reconcile

If you would like to know more, you can book a free 20-minute consultation with me to find out if we are a good match.

As our marriage was dissolving, I searched far and wide for support. Ivana was the only counsellor that my wife could accept. She had already made the decision to leave the marriage and it was important to work with someone who could be completely neutral – someone who did not bring their own agenda into the mix. Ivana held and guided us as we explored our feelings. I remember marvelling many times at the different techniques (NVC, etc.) that she would deploy to help my wife and I to give voice to what longed to be expressed and to understand ourselves better.

Ming, Singapore

How does mediation work?

The work I do is based in Nonviolent Communication (NVC) approach to conflict resolution, according to Marshall Rosenberg and the work of John Kinyon and Ike Lasater. It is based on the trust that if we are able to reveal and hear the need of each side, the right solution will find us. I also apply different modalities and use my skills of Somatic Experiencing, to support nervous system regulation.

Pre-mediation: creating trust to meet needs

I really like to make sure that I fully hear the needs of each side. Sometimes this requires individual consultation before the process of mediation begins. I listen and I check if I hear the needs correctly. We can also discover that there are deeper needs underneath that you were not aware of before. This knowledge can then make the process of mediation more efficient. We are building trust together.

During the process, my partner and I have learned about each other’s feelings and ideas from a depth that we would not be able to reach in an unmediated dialogue.

Marek, Czech Republic

The process: connection comes first

In the process, when we are together, I will be very attentively listening to both (or all) of you. Specifically, I will be listening to what is alive in you, what is important for you, what your needs are. Once I am confident that I have understood your need, I will check if the other side hears it, too. This is how we are going to continue until the important needs have been heard. From the moment of connection, we can invite creativity and focus on possible strategies to meet the needs on both sides.

Out beyond our ideas of right-doing and wrong-doing, there is a field. I’ll meet you there.

Rumi

Before we connect online

At the moment, I offer NVC mediation and coaching mainly online via Zoom. A good internet connection is necessary. Check your audio settings. Update your Zoom. Make sure you are very comfortable before the session – adjust your sitting and your space, so that your body is well-supported, to make most of your session. And I am here to listen to you and to be curious with you. To help you listen to yourself and your partner.  

Ivana will teach you how to listen, how to communicate with empathy, how to read through someone’s words and how to respond to negative messages.

Joanna Vladescu and Martin Sittek, alphayogaschool.com